


Clark Kent is not always polite.

by Anonymous



Category: Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice, Justice League (2017)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Clark being a smartass, Daddy Kink, Dirty Talk, M/M, No Beta We Die Like Superman, One Shot, Rimming, Snark, tagging is hard
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-27
Updated: 2021-02-27
Packaged: 2021-03-18 05:46:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29729229
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Bruce has been gone for two months on business and Clark not getting his dick for that long makes him a bit snippy.
Relationships: Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne
Comments: 4
Kudos: 76
Collections: Anonymous





	Clark Kent is not always polite.

Clark is annoyed and the league knows it. Bruce has been gone on a business trip for two months and whenever Bruce is gone for that long, he gets pissy and has way too much sarcasm. 

To fill in for Bruce until he gets back is Hal Jordan. A green lantern. 

Right now the team is in one of Bruce’s penthouses. It’s they’re temporary headquarters until they get something a bit more advanced. 

Clark is at the coffee machine pouring a cup of coffee in his mug while the rest are at the main table eating some pizza Barry got or on the couch watching TV on the big flat screen. 

Clark reaches into one of the cabinets to get some sugar, but when he gets the box of sugar packets it’s empty. 

“You gotta be kidding me.” He mumbles. “Hey guys would it kill you to throw away stuff when it’s finished?” 

“What are you getting your super panties in a twist about now?” Hal ask. 

“Hal I can easily kick you out, so don’t start. And I’m talking about the sugar.”

“Sorry.” Barry says shyly. “I used it for my coffee, today.”

“All of the packets?”

“I need a lot of caffeine with a lot of sugar, supes.” Clark sighs and sips his coffee, deciding to take it without sugar. 

“Okay everyone, each of us will do a bit of patrol in different cities. Cyborg, Barry I want you guys to cover Detroit. Mainly in midtown, there’s a lot of robberies happening in that area recently.” Clark says

“Got it.” Victor says and Flash grins while eating his pizza. “A chance for some Detroit pizza.”

“Diana you can cover Washington again. Billy-“

“It’s Shazam.”

Clark only gives a bored look before he continues talking. “Anyway I need you and Arthur to cover Boston.” 

“Can we be near the water? I wanna make sure nothing is happening down there too.” Clark nods. “Billy you can cover the land while Arthur is in the ocean for a while. Hal I want you in metropolis.” 

“And what about you twinkle toes? what are you going to do?” Hal ask while grabbing a slice of pizza from one of the boxes on the table and leaning back in his chair. 

“I’ll be in space, watching out for any extraterrestrial threats and listening if someone needs help.” 

“No offense big blue, but I think I should be handling the extraterrestrial threats. After all I’m a green lantern. we’re guardians protecting the universe.” 

Clark doesn’t say anything for a moment, he just starts to turn his head in different directions, to look around. “What are you doing?” Hal ask.

“Looking for someone who asked. Or really gives a shit.” 

Arthur snorts while drinking his beer before snickering, Hal glares at him. “Come on supes, I joined the team because-“

“you didn’t join, we let you be here.” 

Hal flys close to his face. “What’s wrong with you? Aren’t you supposed to be a happy go lucky Boy Scout?”

Clark rolls his eyes at that. He maybe a bit of a Boy Scout sometimes, but he should be able to have other feelings then just being happy all the time. 

“What? is batsy not being here making you all sad?” Hal uses his ring to make a frowny face and Clark only sips his coffee. “You know what, fine, you can be in space. I’m not in the mood for this.” 

Hal smirks and floats away. “Good choice supes. Who knows, with my help, I’ll be prompted to team leader.” 

Hal finished his slice of pizza and grabs another slice from one of the boxes, but before he could take a bite, something zooms past him and his pizza is gone.

“Barry what the hell?” 

“Wasn’t me this time dude.” Barry says while putting his hands up. 

Hal looks around and spots Clark with his pizza in his hand. He eats it right in front of Hal while looking him in the eye.

“That’s the last pepperoni slice.” 

“I know.” Clark says before zooming away. 

—

Clark is flying over metropolis, so far everything is fine. No bank robbers, no one getting mugged, Lex Luthor wasn’t causing trouble. Seems like a quiet day. 

He was about to fly to the other part of the city to check on things there, but he hears something.

“Help, help!” Clark hears and Clark instantly zooms in the other direction, following the sound.

He soon gets to the park. He looks around, but nothing seems wrong. “Did someone ask for help?” He says and one guy points to an area of the park.

Clark sees a middle age women and two teenage girls. He goes over to them and lands. “What seems to be the problem?”

“These two are committing indecent exposure.” The women says while pointing at the two teenage girls. Clark looks a bit confused.

“Um..how?”

The women sneers. “Just look at them.” The teenagers roll their eyes. “Lady it’s only crop tops and shorts.”

“It’s whorish, children play at this park. Back in my day, girls had respect for themselves.” 

Clark gives the women the most unimpressed look ever. God he rather be dealing with bank robbers than this. He’s Superman and he has to deal with a Gertrude or whatever they’re called. 

“You called for help because these two are wearing clothes you don’t like?” 

“I called for help because one of them hit me.”

“Yeah after you grabbed my hair when we tried to walk away, I have it on video.” The girl pulls out her phone and shows Clark what she recorded. Sure enough the women did grab her hair. “M’am maybe it’s best that you go on about your day instead of bothering these two young ladies.” 

“But they’re clothes, how can I enjoy my day here when people walk in the park looking like this?”

“Here’s an idea. Mind your business.” 

The women looks infuriated and goes to slap his face. But Clark grabs her hand. “Trust me, you don’t want to do that.” She pulls away. “Don’t threaten me.”

Clark rolls his eyes. “It’s not a threat lady. Everyone knows there’s a good reason why I’m called the man of steel. Slapping me will break your hand.” 

“You know Superman I thought you be for American values-“

“ma’am no offense, but shut the fuck up.” The women looks appalled and the teenagers snicker. 

Usally Clark doesn’t really swear in public as Superman, but this asshole is seriously getting on his nerves. “How dare you! I’m going to directly call your headquarters. Unbelievable that the justice league has someone like you.” 

Clark snorts a little. “Yeah okay. Just go on about your day and I won’t turn you in to the police for assault.” 

He’s about to go, but the lady stops him. “Wait. I demand to know who is charge of your team.”

“It’s Batman and if you wanna file a complaint to him, call 1-800- kiss my ass.” 

He flys away, leaving the women a bit shocked. 

~~~~~~~~

At 2:30 Clark is back at head quarters. The rest of the team are still on patrol. Clark only came back for a coffee break. 

He doesn’t need it to stay awake or anything like that since he can go days without sleep and not feel tired, but because he’s had an annoying day. 

He washes his mug in the sink and goes to the cabinet to get a bag of coffee. But when he gets it, it’s empty. 

He crumbles the bag in annoyance. 

“Sorry, I had the last of it for myself when I got here.” A voice says and Clark immediately recognizes it. 

He quickly turns around and sees Bruce in a suit.

“Bruce? You’re back.” 

Bruce smiles. “Cut my trip short to see you, baby.” Instead of smiling back and going to hug the older man, Clark gives a bit of an annoyed look. 

“For godsakes Bruce I’ve been telling everyone in the tower for months, If you use something and it’s finished then throw it away.” Clark tosses the empty bag with an annoyed grunt.

“You always nag when you don’t have my dick for that long?” Bruce ask and Clark blushes. “I’m not nagging, you, ass!” 

Bruce chuckles and goes over to the alien. He backs Clark up against the wall, then whispers in his ear. “You missed me a lot, didn’t you baby?”

His deep voice sends a shiver down Clark’s spine. The older man then kisses Clark, making him whimper.

“Missed you so much, daddy.” He whines. 

“I know baby.” He nips at Clark’s neck a bit and runs his hand through his hair. “Please, daddy” 

“Well, okay. But we’ll have to keep it short.”

“Can you finger me?”

“You’ll have to take your suit off.” Clark shakes his head. “No, it’s a homemade suit I made myself. My good suit is in one of the tower bedrooms. So you can just tear this.”

Bruce smirks bit. “Bend over the sofa for me, doll.” Clark nods and quickly gets to the sofa. 

Bruce reaches into his pocket and takes out a batarang. “You carry those in your pockets?”

“Just one, for just in case.”

“Bruce those things are sharp.” 

“I know, witch is perfect right now.” Bruce grabs the fabric and starts to tear it with the batarang. Clark giggles when the blade grazes his skin. “That tickles.”

Of course Superman thinks a blade grazing his skin tickles. When the man gets hit by a bullet, it just feels like a tap to him. 

Once Clark’s ass is exposed, Bruce gropes one of his asscheeks and squeezes a bit. “Daddy, stop teasing.” 

Bruce chuckles and gives Clark’s ass a firm slap. He spreads him open with one hand and puts his tongue on that clenching pink rosebud.

“Ah, daddy! Do not fucking tease me.” 

“Such a sassy mouth on you. I should rinse your mouth with soap, until you’re my sweet boy again.” 

Clark rolls his eyes. “I’m not an innocent little Boy Scout that everyone thinks I am you know.” 

Bruce kisses his hole, making Clark whimper. “Come on doll, you know you wanna be a good boy for daddy.” 

Bruce pokes his hole with a finger and gets it in to the first knuckle. He takes it out quickly and reaches into his other pocket for a bottle of lube. 

He opens it and pours lube straight on Clark’s hole. Bruce puts it back in his pocket and gets two fingers in. He moves them around, making them pull on the rim. “Oh Rao!” 

Bruce withdraws them and uses his thumb to stroke the smooth, slick skin. Clark couldn’t help but buck his hips as Bruce continued to tease him.

“daddy, w-want more.” 

“What’s the magic word, doll?”

Clark gives a glare. Bruce would take it seriously if those blue eyes didn’t look so pretty with tears. “Now.” 

Bruce smirks and puts a thumb in there. He loves when his boy is sweet as sugar and polite, but when Clark is a smartass it amuses him a bit more. 

“When we get home doll, I’m going to fuck and eat you out so much. Make up for those two months.” 

“Y-You better. Fuck!” Bruce is now touching his prostate. 

“Oh love, so rude. I’m definitely taking my time with you. Get you back to being my sweet boy.” 

Bruce takes his thumb out and taps his finger on Clark’s pink hole, just to hear him squeak.

The older man spits on his hole and pushes the saliva inside with one finger. “Maybe I should have you wear your vibrating plug tomorrow. Each time your a naughty, rude boy, I’ll turn it on with the remote.”

“N-no.”

“Yes.” Bruce says with a grin. “Maybe that you’ll teach you not to be so impolite.” Bruce spites on his hole again and watches it open a bit, then clench, sucking the spit in a little. 

“please don’t make me wear the plug daddy, I’ll behave.” He whines. 

Bruce puts two fingers back in and scissors them. “I know you will baby. You always do.” 

~~~~

The next day the league is back in the tower and Bruce is with them in his Batman suit and armor. 

Hal is also there, they decided it be better to keep him permanently. Barry got Chinese food this time instead of pizza. 

As they sat and relaxed a little, they all heard Barry chuckling on the sofa.

“What’s so funny, man?” Victor ask. “Clark is trending because he’s on a Karen video.” Berry says with a laugh. All of them go to Barry and look at his phone.

On it they see Clark telling off a middle age women. “What’s a Karen?” Diana ask.

“A mean bitch.” Arthur answers. 

“Hm so that’s what they’re called. I thought it was Gertrude.” Clark says. 

“No. A Gertrude is a lot meaner and older.” Billy answers. Hal chuckles. “Who knew you weren’t such a polite little Boy Scout after all, supes.” 

“As amusing as this is let’s go over today’s plans.” Bruce says and they all go the table. 

“So today we all might have to go to Venezuela. One of the government officials are being threatened...yes barry?” Clark says

“Um we might have to help Lex luthor today too. News reports say someone hacked into his accounts and robbed him.” Barry says after putting his hand down

“Oh no.” Clark says, but with no urgency or sympathy at all. Wich makes Bruce smirk a little. Clark being a smart ass will always be amusing. 

“Anyways..”

**Author's Note:**

> I always headcannon Henry cavill’s Superman having some sass since he’s not too much of a Boy Scout and Bruce just finding it cute and amusing.


End file.
